By Ted Schredd
We all wonder what to buy our friends and family
every Christmas. We end up with sweaters, socks, power
tools and “practical items”. Why not give
them something that will help them discover more of
what makes them happy. It will take a little investigation
and some listening but once you find the target you,
and your receiver of gift (Rog), will be brighter
in spirit and pleased with your efforts.
A lot of times people are uncomfortable treating themselves
for an adventure, an opportunity for growth or some
well deserved pampering. And this is where you come
in and solve your giving confusion with life enhancing
It all begins with the investigation. It has to be
done with finesse so that they divulge their secret
to you. These questions will help you to discover
what it is that your Rog desires. You can ask these
questions of the people around your Rog, or get the
information right from the mouth of the Rog.
Let’s start with adventure. Say you saw Survivor
or something and mention how exciting that show seems.
Then ask your Rog something like, “If you could
go out and do an adventure what would it be?”
If it is something that you can purchase or arrange
for them – make it so. Skydiving? Fishing? Bungee
Jumping? If it is going to the moon it might be out
of your budget but just ask and see what comes up.
Nearly every outdoor activity business sells a gift
certificate of some kind. Buy one for yourself and
both go at the same time….
I don’t think there is enough supporting of
peoples fun dreams. After watching the world unfold
in the last couple years I have realized that you
never know when you could get snuffed out whether
its’ from hijacked airplanes, deranged snipers
or war or whatever. I think it is far more important
to help those around your search out their own desires
- We need to support each other for our dreams.
You can always buy a set of lessons as a gift. “If
there was something that you always wanted to learn
what would that be?” Cooking, music, activity,
any kind of creativity lessons are all wonderful opportunities.
Karate, Mountain Biking, Rock Climbing or any other
physical skill. Woodworking or interior decorating.
There are hundreds of possibilities. What if they
have always wanted to speak another language and you
paid for lessons? See if you can find something that
you both want to do and then go along and support
them. If they try it and it doesn’t work out
at least they don’t to spend the rest of their
days wishing that they had.
For some lower priced gifts – try this one.
“I remember playing Frisbee as a kid –
what did you do for play as a kid?” As a small
Rog they played with model rockets and kites. Maybe
they liked to skip rope, or play baseball. Get them
a bat and a ball. Or any other toy that they reveal
as pleasurable and it is still practical for them
to play with. Maybe it is just an add-on to another
present – like a yo-yo and a sweater. If you
find the Rog’s childhood game you can pat yourself
on the back.
Now if these first three neither provide you an affordable
option or a clear choice
this fourth category may reveal another gift. Let’s
say your Rog is burned out, overworked and getting
ugly. They would probably love a day at the spa, or
a massage. Say you were watching a show on the learning
channel about Germany how they get free spa use on
their health insurance. Then ask the Rog, “So
if you could go for some tender care today what would
it be, a pedicure, a manicure, a massage, a double
massage, a mud bath?” They will let you know.
Then get it for them. Tell them to use whenever they
want because they deserve it – they are a good
person. Give them a weekend away with their loved
one. You don’t have to send them to Vegas just
send them away to a bed and breakfast for a couple
Now what if all these are too expensive –well
this is where the fun begins. Why not make a gift?
With a little effort you can make just about anything.
Whether it’s baking, art, crafts, or whatever
it is, chances is it will be a very enjoyable experience
for you too. It sure beats sitting in traffic or shopping
at the mall.
You may have technical skills that could be used around
their house, woodworking, plumbing, lawn care, or
some other home improvement skill. You could give
a free housecleaning or a baby sitting. One free car
wash inside and out. Make up a nice hand written card
or certificate to make it official. Write a thoughtful
letter about how much you appreciate your Rog. Gifts
from the heart speak volumes over gifts from the pocketbook.
Your words will mean more to your Rog than a new pair
Besides practical gifts are boring. If you are looking
for a different angle for Christmas Giving –
Give the gift of fun or pleasure. When you give this
kind of gift, you say I love you, I support you and
I want you to have a great time.