We all wonder what to buy our friends and family every Christmas. We end up with sweaters, socks, power tools and “practical items”. Why not give them something that will help them discover more of what makes them happy. It will take a little investigation and some listening but once you find the target you, and your receiver of gift (Rog), will be brighter in spirit and pleased with your efforts.

A lot of times people are uncomfortable treating themselves for an adventure, an opportunity for growth or some well deserved pampering. And this is where you come in and solve your giving confusion with life enhancing gifts.

It all begins with the investigation. It has to be done with finesse so that they divulge their secret to you. These questions will help you to discover what it is that your Rog desires. You can ask these questions of the people around your Rog, or get the information right from the mouth of the Rog.

Let’s start with adventure. Say you saw Survivor or something and mention how exciting that show seems. Then ask your Rog something like, “If you could go out and do an adventure what would it be?” If it is something that you can purchase or arrange for them – make it so. Skydiving? Fishing? Bungee Jumping? If it is going to the moon it might be out of your budget but just ask and see what comes up. Nearly every outdoor activity business sells a gift certificate of some kind. Buy one for yourself and both go at the same time….

I don’t think there is enough supporting of peoples fun dreams. After watching the world unfold in the last couple years I have realized that you never know when you could get snuffed out whether its’ from hijacked airplanes, deranged snipers or war or whatever. I think it is far more important to help those around your search out their own desires - We need to support each other for our dreams.


You can always buy a set of lessons as a gift. “If there was something that you always wanted to learn what would that be?” Cooking, music, activity, any kind of creativity lessons are all wonderful opportunities. Karate, Mountain Biking, Rock Climbing or any other physical skill. Woodworking or interior decorating. There are hundreds of possibilities. What if they have always wanted to speak another language and you paid for lessons? See if you can find something that you both want to do and then go along and support them. If they try it and it doesn’t work out at least they don’t to spend the rest of their days wishing that they had.

For some lower priced gifts – try this one. “I remember playing Frisbee as a kid – what did you do for play as a kid?” As a small Rog they played with model rockets and kites. Maybe they liked to skip rope, or play baseball. Get them a bat and a ball. Or any other toy that they reveal as pleasurable and it is still practical for them to play with. Maybe it is just an add-on to another present – like a yo-yo and a sweater. If you find the Rog’s childhood game you can pat yourself on the back.


Now if these first three neither provide you an affordable option or a clear choice this fourth category may reveal another gift. Let’s say your Rog is burned out, overworked and getting ugly. They would probably love a day at the spa, or a massage. Say you were watching a show on the learning channel about Germany how they get free spa use on their health insurance. Then ask the Rog, “So if you could go for some tender care today what would it be, a pedicure, a manicure, a massage, a double massage, a mud bath?” They will let you know. Then get it for them. Tell them to use whenever they want because they deserve it – they are a good person. Give them a weekend away with their loved one. You don’t have to send them to Vegas just send them away to a bed and breakfast for a couple of nights.

Now what if all these are too expensive –well this is where the fun begins. Why not make a gift? With a little effort you can make just about anything. Whether it’s baking, art, crafts, or whatever it is, chances is it will be a very enjoyable experience for you too. It sure beats sitting in traffic or shopping at the mall.

You may have technical skills that could be used around their house, woodworking, plumbing, lawn care, or some other home improvement skill. You could give a free housecleaning or a baby sitting. One free car wash inside and out. Make up a nice hand written card or certificate to make it official. Write a thoughtful letter about how much you appreciate your Rog. Gifts from the heart speak volumes over gifts from the pocketbook. Your words will mean more to your Rog than a new pair of socks.

Besides practical gifts are boring. If you are looking for a different angle for Christmas Giving – Give the gift of fun or pleasure. When you give this kind of gift, you say I love you, I support you and I want you to have a great time.